| Heroism is a funny thing. It's not really something i know a lot about. I've spent much of my life rather devoid of heroes. History served me up a dicey lot, and real life has been little better. William Wallace was one of my favorite childhood characters. I wanted to have one love, one passion, and an honest devotion like the Wallace of Jane Porter's imagination - to be like Wallace. Ance drove a jeep, edited videos, had a beautiful wife, and talked of taking America back for God. John was a politico who was fighting for all the right things. These were a few from the handful of men whom I actually looked up to and desired to emulate. Good rule of thumb: if you respect someone, never work on their personal computer or read about them at a collegiate level. Behind facades of righteousness i found immorality, hypocrisy, lies, and, in the case of Wallace, a potential man skinner who is reported to have made a sword belt out of one of his enemies. Reality bites, and it generally does so pretty hard. Often my expectations have probably been set a little too high. I've felt secure only with perfection, and been jaded and cynical if I found anything else. But then again, if i'm going to look up to or copy someone, it doesn't seem bad to look for truthfulness, grace, courage, vision... To be disappointed by a father who yells at his children, by a campaigner who lives a double life, a teacher who doesn't know his proclaimed subject. In light of these things, today was a rather startling day. In the space of 24 hours i met two men whom i believe that I can call heroes. Barnabas Mam was a covert agent in Cambodia. As a younger man he was assigned to spy on a Christian meeting. He ended up being powerfully impacted by the message he heard. He experienced first hand the horrors of the Killing Fields and served long prison time under the brutal Khmer Rouge. His family, which numbered in the 30s, were, with only one exception, all killed during this time. Barnabas was a name given him first as a nickname - and it fits him as aptly as it did for that original "son of encouragement". There is a joy, peace, and passion in his eyes. In our culture of victim-hood, you'd expect a man who has experienced what he has to be troubled at best. He is, instead, triumphant. Barnabas knows and walks with God's spirit. Oh, and there is grace in that man. That was this morning. Tonight I got to shake the hand of Greg Mortenson. If my biography could someday read like his, i would be a happy man. For years he has devoted his life to building schools (especially for girls) in Afghanistan and Pakistan. There is an easygoing compassion and empathy in Greg. He is deeply knowledgeable and has a subtly nuanced and rich understanding of the people and ways of central Asia - and humanity. Long before 9/11 he was working in this region, and today his writings are required reading for many military and security agents. Both presidential candidates have sought his endorsement. Refusing to become political, he has calmly offered to talk with either of them if they are elected. Greg is not a man of easy answers, but of profound lessons. Tonight he talked about failure, mountain climbing, militias, opium, infant mortality, communication, letting go, and the power of educated girls. Both of these men posses an almost tangible gentleness. There is a strength only possible after conquered fear. It's a very good feeling to look up instead of down. 
Whitefish Point Light, Lake Superior, MI
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